


Love Again

by thedesolationoffeels



Category: The Philosophers (2013)
Genre: F/M, mr zimit finally has a semi happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-06
Updated: 2014-07-06
Packaged: 2018-02-07 15:48:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1904763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedesolationoffeels/pseuds/thedesolationoffeels
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loving Petra was like a whirlwind.</p>
<p>Or Mr Zimit finally gets a happy ending</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love Again

Petra wondered. She wondered whether it was possible to be in love with two different people at once. She wondered whether her soul could forgive and forget. She wondered if she could handle losing him. 

_Him_. 

With a sigh she closed her eyes. The weather was warm, the sun bright and her room, pastel and simple, glowed. She was lying on her bed, hair a golden halo on the pillow. She lay there and she wondered. 

With the end of the thought experiment came the end of her schooling. She had completed all she had to complete and all with the best of effort. Her report was flawless, ready to accept her into any college she could want. 

The invitation from Ithaca lay on her desk, untouched since she first opened it. 

Should she accept it?

'Oh, Eric, Eric,' a murmur came from her lips. He had acted odd yet unsurprising on that final lesson and even with all his threats and accusations, a clear A was written in her report. With that A she knew he had accepted defeat, he accepted that he had lost. 

Their kiss, flittering and light, had seemed to burn her lips.

She loved James, she knew, and yet Eric Zimit couldn't stay out of her mind. He was intelligent and he made her feel that way too. James was full of physical affection, of small nothing's whispered into her ears and arms warm around her waist. He didn't make her feel smart, he didn't make her feel different. He made her feel wanted and loved but not in the way Eric did. 

Their relationship was strained, with Eric fearing disgrace or gossip for the either of them. Their meetings would be brief and few and yet every time Petra felt entranced by him. When they spoke they talked of theories and figures and of the mind. Their conversations could last so long she would forget herself and everything around her, focusing and feeling only his voice. 

When they kissed, there was no heat or passion but an underlying love neither could talk about. Eric kissed her with respect and she with curious interest. Conversations about their relationships were avoided like an unspoken taboo and Petra didn't mind. Even if they were to talk about it, she would have no idea what to say. 

James was the opposite and she didn't yet know whether she enjoyed that aspect or hated it. For now, it was simply just a fact. 

A breeze blew and the scent of blooming jasmine wafted into the room. Petra opened her eyes and sat up, hugging her knees under herself. She tilted her head and looked at the Ithaca invitation lying across from her, as if hoping it could give her advice. 

There was one thing she knew; she couldn't keep both James and Eric. She was to either leave with James or stay with Eric. She had to choose. 

Slowly, her hand reached out and picked up a photo from her bedside bench. It was a photo taken that very month of her and James. They were in the flower gardens, smiling, hands clasped in each others'. Lightly, she brushed a finger over their faces. 

Who could she afford to lose?

 

* * *

 

Eric Zimit was a lonely man. His apartment, white walled and impeccably neat, held an emptiness that ghosted at the back of his mind whenever he was there. It was always present and suffocating and more than once he had picked up the pistol he kept in a drawer. That always tended to drive the demons away. 

However, ever since the last day of school, those demons doubled in amount. He felt numb, like a walking puppet. The thought experiment happened a week ago and since then, every day was like a noose around his neck. 

He needed a distraction, something or someone to take his mind off his lonesome reality. He needed...her. 

Eric scoffed and lay his head on the desk in front of him. Who was he kidding? She could never be his. 

Just as he thought about the whiskey bottle hidden in his work table, there was a knock on the door. 

In bad spirits and uncaring, Eric didn't even lift his head. 

The knocking game again and he groaned, pushing himself upright and staggering to the door. He mumbled to himself as he pulled on the latch. 

'Who the hell would bother to-'

The door opened and the words died in his throat. He blinked at his visitor. 

'...Petra?'

The corners of Petra's lips curled. 'Hello, Eric. I came to talk. Would you mind if I came inside?'

Without a word he stepped back and allowed her to enter, closing and locking the door behind her. Turning, he watched as she sat down in a pale green cushioned couch and shrugged out of a thin scarf. She held his gaze steadily and he felt his palms sweat. 

'Would you like a drink?'

'I wouldn't mind.'

The offer was one merely to get him occupied as he gratefully made his way to the open kitchen that was part of the large room. As he opened the refrigerator, he timidly asked the question that was tearing a hole in his brain. 

'Uh, what exactly did you come here to talk about?'

'Me.'

His heart sank and inside he gave a cold chuckle. What else was he expecting? She could never be his. 

Gather up whatever resolve he still had in him, Eric moved and handed Petra a glass of cooled coconut water. She accepted it with a smile he couldn't make himself return, instead walking backwards to lean against the wall. 

'So what it is you wished to say?'

'My report is, honestly, quite perfect and liable to get me accepted into almost any college both in Indonesia and overseas. Thank you for the A, by the way.'

'You deserved it.'

'Who else got it?'

He wondered about lying but decided against it. 'Nobody.'

She looked down at the glass nursed in her hands. 'My opportunities are almost limitless but all of them have one fact written in fine print; I will have to leave either you or James behind.'

Eric tensed. 'Petra-'

'You taught me about logic, Eric,' Petra continued determinedly. 'You were the one who told me that in any situation, no matter how big or small, there is a sacrifice to be made. However, the only way to properly get past such a hurdle is to balance what you are willing to give away and see whether it will be worth it.'

_You will leave me._

'I have balanced you and James because I know I can only have one of you. That loss is precisely the sacrifice I must understand.'

_You will leave me for him_. 

Eric licked his dry lips. 'And have you made a choice?'

_Please don't go._

Petra nodded and smiled, placing down her half full glass and entwining her fingers together. 'I decided,' she began lightly, 'that what you said was right.'

He frowned. 'And what exactly did I say?'

Her smile grew. 'Ithaca will be cold and Jakarta has some excellent universities.'

There was a silence broken only by the birds outside. Eric stared at the girl wide-eyed, not believing the words from her mouth. The words that he had so desperately wished for and for so long he had discarded them as mere fantasies never to come true. 

She was staying. 

_She was staying._

And yet, his mind was not at rest. 

'But,' he stammered and the spell was broken. 'But what about James?' 

Her smile faltered. 'James is a good person, kind and warm, but there are many others like him. His brain is good and he will manage well without me. But you? You are one of a kind. I will never find another like you.'

Light headed, Eric couldn't control the smile forming on his lips and almost laughed aloud at the little voice in his head that muttered _I'm too old for this._  

'So, so you-'

'Yes, I am staying,' Petra said with a smile, standing up and walking to him. 'Or do you not believe me?'

To him, loving Petra was a whirlwind. There were moments where he felt blessed and in a dream to kiss and touch her and yet at other times she could crush and destroy. Her words to him were calming and yet he still felt that deep panic that maybe, just maybe, she wasn't going to keep them. 

'Maybe,' he said slowly, 'you should promise that.'

'With what? A pinkie promise?' she laughed, running a hand up his arm and nestling it behind his head. 'Is that what you want me to do?'

A chuckle escaped him and he sighed. 'Probably not,' he admitted. 'But I still would still like some certainty.'

'And you shall have it,' she breathed, leaning forward to press their lips together, to forge the promise. 

And, at least for that moment, Eric believed her. 

**Author's Note:**

> a user wanted mr zimit to have a happy ending so here you go  
> their relationship is complex and zimit is hella sad so this is as happy as i can see him


End file.
